Stuck in Tree

Ok, here's the much-requested story about seeing the mother rhino and her one-month-old baby...

When we spotted this pair, they were at a distance, so our driver was trying to get us closer. The guides here are terrific and they are always trying to get us into position for the best possible photos. In this case, he tried to drive under a tree. Somehow he misjudged the height of one of the big branches. The branches cleared the first two rows in the Land Rover, but it got lodged in the last row of seats.

That's where I was sitting. I was the only one in the row, so I moved to the floor knowing that the guide would try to drive us out of this predicament. The branch wasn't going anywhere, so I stuck my head out the side of the Land Rover and I realized the baby rhino was only about 15 feet away. I just squeezed my camera out and snapped a couple photographs of the baby. Jackpot! Then, of course, I couldn't move at all because I was stuck on the floor with the branch right above my back and head.

Finally after few tries, the other passengers lifted the branch so that the Land Rover could get free. Yes, I was a bit uncomfortable, but I couldn't stop laughing the whole time. The rest of the volunteers thought it was the funniest thing ever. This is part of what I love about Thanda. You never quite know what will happen next. It's all part of the adventure!!!

Life at Thanda

Hello World!!! The first week in Thanda in KwaZulu Natal, South Africa had been amazing! Because this is my second visit here, the photography workshop was a great refresher. Like everyone else, I was anxious to get into the field. We've already seen so much. The best part of the week was seeing the mother rhino and her one-month-old baby. I was literally stuck under a tree, but more on that later...

In this post, I thought I’d share a little information about the basics of life in Thanda. There’s really not much water here. We collect rainwater to be used in the toilet tank. Some days we have water for showers, some days there just isn't any water so showers are out of the question. We do have bottled water for drinking and cooking, but we're careful with that too.  

There’s no Wi-Fi at the camp/lodge. Cellphone service isn't great either. And, of course, we don't have cable TV. That's OK because, once people get here, we really don't have an interest in online entertainment or keeping up with the rest of the world. This is a simpler place. Our entertainment is conversation or observing nature or simply enjoying the peace.

The weather here is very different from when I was here 7 months ago. It’s hotter and a lot more humid. It's often cloudy and it rains a lot more. As a result, the land is so much greener than last time I was here. The greener it gets, the more alive it becomes. Yes, there many different bugs, and a lot of them are much bigger than the last time I was here. 

I cannot believe it’s only Week Two and I have so many stories to share!!!  (Despite what I said about technology, I did get a USB modem so I'll be able to post a little more often than last time.)  For today, I just want to say that I'm having a blast!  I feel so lucky to have found Thanda.  I feel so lucky to be here again for a longer stay.  I'm living my dream, and I'm very happy.  To be continued!!!

On My Way...

It's been 222 days since I left South Africa. Tonight I am going to get on a plane for a return trip. I have wanted to go back to Africa ever since the day I left.

When I came back last summer, I tried to buckle down and get serious about a job, but all I could think about was Africa. When I finally found work, I decided that I would slash expenses and save, save, save. There were some sacrifices. I stopped shopping for anything, but the essentials. I socialized less and gave up sports. I worked overtime every chance I got.

By the end of the year, I realized that I had enough for the volunteering program at Thanda. My parents saw how much I wanted to go back so they gave me the plane ticket as a Christmas present. (Nice present! Nice present!) Tonight they will drive me to the airport. The departure is very different than last time. I remember saying goodbye to both of my brothers before going to the airport. This time my little brother is away at college and my big brother will be working when I leave. I won't see either of them for a long time.

I am very away that the future is unknown. I know that I want to make a difference in the world. I have some specific goals, but I am leaving here with a completely open mind. Anything is possible. There may be sacrifices or hard times, but I'm ready for that. Somehow Africa is part of what I am supposed to do with my life. I believe this might be the biggest challenge in my life and I am as ready as I can be. I want to make the most of every moment.

Grab the Moment

Last night, I was coming back from an errand, (there are a lot of errands when you are planning to be out of country for three months!) We are having a January thaw and, when I got out of my car, it was very windy, but still quite warm. The sky wasn't exactly clear of clouds, but it was clear enough to see the moon, stars, and the clouds. I found myself just standing outside and looking up at the sky. I got so lost in the moment--my hair whipping in the wind and the way the wind felt on my face. That's when I realized I am pretty damn happy with my life and the unknown future of my life. It has been a while since I felt like that.

How did I get here? Honestly, there are many factors and I can't sort them all out here. Recently, many family members and close friends have been telling me that not everyone can do what I am doing. It turns out that I have commitment, passion, and most importantly patience. Ironically, I learned something about all three by growing up deaf.

I've also been forced to think more about life and death because of things that have happened in the past few years. Life is too damn short to put off things or not take chances or worry about being perfect. "Live your life and make the most out of it" has become one of my mottos. Laugh more than you worry. Love people. Be passionate about what you do. Open up to the moment whether it's photographing lions in Africa or getting out of your car on a windy night in your driveway in Ohio. Live your life and leave no regrets.

Comfort Zone

Three months in South Africa...I am excited and a little nervous. This is definitely the longest time I will have been out of my home country. Because the people at Thanda are always changing, I won't know many people when I get there. Some people seem to think I'm brave for doing this. Some people probably think I've lost my mind. I think it's safe to say this is completely out of my comfort zone. But that's kind of the point.

When I think back on it, my best experiences have always come when I stepped out of the "Safe Zone." In elementary school, I was sheltered at a safe school with a deaf program. When I transferred to a mainstream school where I was the only deaf student, it was hard but I learned so much more about the world and about myself.

In college, I decided against playing soccer at a Division Three school. Division One was tough--I got cut from the team--but the experience I got there allowed me to be on the Deaflympics team that won gold in Taiwan.

That trip now looks "safe" because I was with a team, so all the travel decisions were pretty much made for me. Going to South Africa the first time was a stretch because I had to figure out a lot of things for myself. On that trip, I was nervous about whether I could find my way around an international airport and whether I could do what volunteers needed to do.

And now, I'm going to stretch again. Three months is a long time, but I feel like it will give me growing room. I want to get the most out of my life. I want to make a difference in the world. I don't think I can do those things in the "Safe Zone." So I'm stepping away from what's comfortable and predictable.

Hello Again...

I've decided to start blogging agin, in part because I'm heading off on another adventure. I don't know if this is necessary, but it seemed like maybe I should give a little explanation of how I got from the last blog entry to this one. Maybe I just want to explain the last few months to myself.

Visiting Taiwan for Deaflympics opened my eyes to the larger world. I knew that I wanted to travel, but while I was in college, I couldn't quite figure out how to make it happen. I thought about a semester in Australia. I tried to convince my parents that I should spend spring break helping baby turtles in Costa Rica. I considered going to Turkey with the USAD soccer team. Nothing was clicking.

Then, one day, I read about a volunteer program at the Thanda Wildlife Refuge in South Africa. They needed people to take photographs of animals and to help with other projects. Something about this program called to me. Despite some concerns about malaria, AIDs, and other safety issues, I convinced my parents that this would be a good experience after I graduated from college.

When I left for Thanda in May of 2012, I didn't really know what I was getting into. I just knew that, after four and half years of studying, I wanted to do something completely different. I wanted out of my comfort zone.

My time volunteering in South Africa was everything I hoped for--and more. I fell in love with Africa. I don't know whether it was the people, the wildlife, the land, or the work. I just loved everything about the month I spent in Thanda. I got to do so many different things--photography for research and the database at the nature reserve, community projects including working with children, and conservation work including learning how to use a machete to hack out invasive plants. Somehow these experiences added up to the most rewarding month I have ever had in my life. Ever since I left Africa on June 24th, there hasn't been a day without Africa in my mind.

And now I'm going back. It took a while to save up what I'll need for the program, but I did it and I'll leave at the end of the month. This time, I want to record and share more of what I see, feel, and learn while I am in Africa. I'll be away for three months, and I know I'll miss some good times--an engagement party for a special friend, St. Patty Day, the annual Rugby Fish Fry, several important birthdays. I know life here won't stop while I'm away.

I also know that going back to Africa feels like what I am supposed to do. It's hard to explain why I feel this way. Maybe that's why I wanted to start this blog again. Something about being Africa is really important for me. I want to figure out what that is. You're welcome to come along for the journey.

P.S.--I don't know exactly when I will post because Internet access in Africa will be unpredictable.

"Multi-converse"

After a few months of feeling lost and dealing with death, I have decided to stop worrying about what other people think of me. Life is short. You have to do the best you can. You have to assume other people are doing the best they can.

Thinking this way is changing the way I feel about being deaf. I used to worry that if I joked about my deafness, other people would think I am not a serious person. Or maybe they would think being deaf does not matter to me. I am a serious person, but I also love to joke around with friends. I can see that laughing together makes people closer, but here is the problem; I do not hear the weird rumors and funny stories that are floating around. And I definitely do not catch the one-liners that people toss around in groups.

When there are a lot of people around, very few people stick with one-on-one conversations. People jump in and out of conversations all the time. It is not that they want to interrupt an ongoing conversation. They are just simply adding their thoughts and then the conversation takes a new direction and then someone else adds a thought and things go in a completely different direction. I think of this as "multi-conversing."

Hearing people do not need a word for this because it comes so naturally to them. It is easy for them to talk to more than one person at a time or keep up with more than one conversation at a time. Due to my deafness, "multi-conversing" does not work for me, even though I see that it is lots of fun for hearing people. I am not sure deaf people can "multi-converse" even in ASL because you really need to pay attention to the speaker and, in any case, I am not fluent enough in ASL to know for sure.

I worked hard to become an oral deaf person. Most people think I rely on lip-reading to understand what people are saying, but that is not completely true. Lip-reading is very complicated. Every person's lips are different. When I meet someone for the first time, it takes a while before I can read their lips. It is sort of the way hearing people have to adjust to an accent. At first they might not understand the person fully. I do not really hear accents, but I can see speech differences in the lips. That assumes, of course, that I can see a person's lips. If I have a professor with a thick beard, I would not be able to read his lip clearly at all. Fortunately, my hearing aids help me hear just a little bit and that fills in some of what I cannot do with lip-reading.

The bottom line is that often I do not understand what people say to me. I have never known how to let people know that I am not getting what they think they are communicating. It is embarrassing for me--maybe for them. Anyway, today I thought I would try something different. They say if you always do the same thing, you always get the same results. So this was my experiment to see if doing something different would produce a better result.

I was at a meeting, and my all-time favorite professor was there. We were having a conversation one-on-one and, at one point, I made a small sort of pointless joke. I could tell my professor did not catch what I said, but he laughed anyway. I decided to bust him: “You have no idea what I just said, do you?” He responded, “Nope!”

In the past, I would have felt frustrated. I know when people do not understand me, but I do not usually speak up. But today, I felt as though his failure to understand gave us something in common. I have been in that particular situation so many times in my life. I know what it is like to be clueless about what was said and laughing along with others even though I do not know what's funny. So I gave him a huge smile and said, "Welcome to my world." He grinned and laughed and gave me a big hug. That was definitely a better result, and I was trying to figure out what made the difference.

I think in the past I have been really sensitive about my “deaf feelings.” I do not want to be explaining my situation all the time, but then I feel angry—at other people for not understanding and at myself for not helping them to understand. This situation worked because I was able to use humor. Just a small joke about a small mistake turned a potentially negative experience into a positive experience. Humor changed an awkward experience into an experience that helped the other person understand my situation better. I think I’ll try this “experiment” again!